The "Only" one

Are you ever the "only" one that has to take and pick up your own kid and his/her friends and deliver them to their destination? Well I am and have been now for sometime. It used to be that there were some other Parents that were considerate enough to help out. My Youngest Son is 16 and so close to having his drivers license, which really wouldn't make too much difference because then I will start the "new" worry when he is out on his own. Anyway, now seems that his friends Parents are never ever willing to share this huge responsibility. I have always been know as the "cool" Mom and of course I like that. This title comes with so many extra duties too. Most of these poor kids can either stay at home, have a driving friend pick them up or me pick them up. It has finally gotten to me for the last time. I try real hard to explain to these teens about making plans and communicating about how they are getting where they plan on going and they just don't get it. My Son told me today that we had a "generation gap", I laughed and said that every generation experiences that. We are very close, and now that he is a young adult going on 30 something, we tend to clash a little more about these kids of things. My Son means well and I know that the other kids do to, I am just trying to get them to respect others, like me, and think of others and not just themselves. I feel like I am the Mother to many kids most times. I just wish that the other Parents were willing to shuttle all the kids around like I do. I have had to put my foot down today, because I ran them around last night and today. Then they wanted me to do the same again tonight as their plans changed abruptly, their driver all of a sudden could not take the car out, and his Parents always do this. It is a very sad thing, but I told my Son that they could all stay in at our house tonight or they could all go home, but I was not going to chauffeur again tonight. Most of the time I give in because I know that my Son and his friends have found other ways, not always safe, of getting where they want to go and I would not be able to live with myself if anything ever happened to them because I would not take them. I wish the other Parents would feel that same guilt. At least now I have the weather on my side, since it is a chilling 39 degrees right now, brrrr......so for now they are all in our house chillin' and eating and enjoying each other's company. I know this "kodak" moment won't last long. I am sure I will have to continue to some degree of shuttling the kids around. I just hope I can convince myself to remain calm about it. Soon enough our kids will be grown and gone :)

Remember: Never quit loving your kids, no matter what.

Thanksgiving

It is hard to believe that another traditional family gathering is just around the corner. Since my circumstances changed abruptly for me this year I was not sure I was going to cook the "greatest" meal of the year. Thanksgiving is and always has been my favorite holiday. I am a true traditionalist and surprisingly so I have been able to pass that onto my boys. Anyway, my Parents came to our house last year from Bella Vista, AR. That was the first visit to see us since we moved to GA, in May 2003. Of course it was great, we always went to them. Well they were going to return again this year, well that did not work out either. So I had planned to cook, I really enjoy that anyway. Well I have a friend that thought one of her older boys were going to host the great eating fest at one of their "new" homes. Doesn't look hopeful. This is a week before and she has not heard from them. I decided that I am going to have the fabulous feast at my home. Turns out my youngest Son's girlfriend and another friend of his will not be enjoying the turkey holiday with their families. Come on, the girlfriend's Mother doesn't cook so she and the girlfriend's younger brother will be going to a movie and eating out! WHAT??? The friend has to work and his family is going to be with their extended family in VA! Come on people, this is a holiday for families and friends to come together to spend time with and enjoy a wonderful feast and remember what we have to be "thankful" for. So as usual, I will have these extra guests. I thoroughly enjoy having a lot of people to cook for. I certainly will not allow for kids to just not have anyone to share this special time with. If I could, I would open up my home to everyone and anyone. Sure I still don't have a job, but I have figured out how to make things work out and not worry about it. I know that my families situation is in the hands of a higher power and we will be just fine. So if you think that you are not able to or can't have a great Thanksgiving celebration, then you need to talk to me, because you can!

Remember: Be thankful for ALL that you have!

Energy

Where do you get your energy from? Most people are so concerned for me since I am jobless and rightfully so. However, I feel more energized now than when I was going into my job day to day. I have seen a major change in my whole attitude about everything. Yes, I do not have a job, bu emotionally and physically I feel the best I have ever had. I just feel this great new found energy and it all has to do with the "freedom" to do what I want and be happy about it all for a change. I know I need to stay energized in order to continue to move forward with all my dreams and ideas. I have always been an idea person and never had the time to really focus on any of them. I'm sure that you too have had ideas and have felt the same way. I know I will accomplish what I have set out to do. You can't do everything all at the same time. We have to do what we can, while staying jazzed, one step at a time. It will all come together sooner than later. Staying energized and jazzed are easy to do as long as you tell yourself " I can do this." Just like the little engine that could, "I think I can, I think I can." Of course you can. Our minds are very strong and easily swayed. That's why it is always important to tell yourself positive things everyday and feel the energy. If you need to take a walk or a drive or something to find your energy, do it today. No matter what anyone else tells you, listen to yourself. Only you know exactly what you are capable of.

Remember: Today is the day!

Opportunities

I have never really forced myself to realize just how many great and wonderful opportunities await each and every one of us until now. I have always worked my job took care of my boys and our household and went to bed, got up the next day to do it all over again. There is way more to life than just the day to day routines and we all need to wake up and find them. I was always lead to believe that I should be more cautious and not take risks and that is true for some things but many others I have found that I need to come out of my "comfort" zone and discover all the areas I can benefit from. So this is what I am doing now, full speed head. I lost my job in an industry that I have been in for 25 yrs and struggled most of the time and now I am doing so many different things. I have "come out of my shell" so to speak. I invested in becoming a real estate agent, because I know my vast experience in the mortgage industry will help me and I am sure you could expand on any of your experience to find a great opportunity as well. I am tired of sitting in an office all day. It is time for me to get out there and really find myself, because I lost myself about 7 years ago. I have had a difficult time coming back and I am now strong enough and determined enough to do everything that I can get my hands on. So I know that there are many other people out there that may feel the same as me and may be depressed or unhappy or unmotivated to think that they can not do anything good for themselves and I am here to tell you that YOU CAN! I am here to help you see that and help you find that. If you have any kind of issues that are blocking you from your opportunities, please let me know and I will and can help you figure them out. I feel that all my life's experiences and my career experiences will help many people just like me. So write me and let me help out!

Remember: You can do anything you want and be anything you want only if you try.

A "Real" friend

What is a "real" friend? I guess I am too laid back and easy going. I am usually very reserved when I meet new people. You have to kind of store your thoughts about them to be used at a later date. It's crushing when you put all your time and efforts in what you believe is a true friend to find out you have know a "FAKE". That hurts! You know they say you really know some one when you live with them. Wrong.......been there, done that. I am not really sure if we ever know that we can ever trust someone or know they are really a friend to us. We just have to go with the flow, day by day and just try to be trusting until the "friend" gives you a reason to think otherwise. I think friends are overrated anyway. It would be nice to have more like many people I know. I guess I am just not supposed to have many or 2 or 3. I don't know. So I will just try to work on myself and more "real friends" will come my way someday.

Remember: Don't throw stones at glass houses

Survival

Isn't it funny how stress gets to us and sometimes we don't even realize it. Of course my back is on the fritz, has been for 3 days now. I have to mend myself and it is difficult when there is not much help in my household. My boys will do something for me if I beg and plead with them. At night when I am supposed to be sleeping, my mind just races and worries about money, a job and how I will survive. Then I don't get much sleep and I'm sure you can figure the end result. I have survived other detriments to my financial picture and managed to rise above it all. It's just now it seems much more severe. I don't have a spouse or boyfriend to lean on and it sure would be nice to have that special someone to lean on. Wouldn't it be great if we could all ban together to help each other? After all that 's all we really have is each other. So today I will try to do some positive things and help reduce my stress and look for the good things in this day.

Remember: It is what it is

The grim job search

Isn't it funny how you may find a prospective employer that has an immediate need to fill a position and it takes forever to hear back from them? Today's times are the worst I've ever experienced. Finding gainful employment seems very dismal at this point. I try to stay positive and all that, but I still continue, secretly, to worry about my not too distant future. It seems that right now a decent paying job is not to be found. There are so many people like me that are also doing the same thing. It would be great if our very own gov't would help us out. There is too much bureaucracy within our country which therefore hurts the little people like us. We should be able to access unemployment much quicker and receive more than what the max is-$330. a week. Not too many people can live on that. That's $1430. a month. WOW ! I was against the Wall Street bailout like many of you, and yet our "loyal" Senate and House reps were forced to vote for it. The "working" people of this Country need the bailout help long before the corps of Wall Street! Those CEO's and other higher ups that received so many millions with their jobs certainly don't have to worry about whether or not they can feed their families or pay their monthly living expenses, while the "little" like us that have worked long, hard hours get the "shaft". Regardless of "who" will be our next President, they will be walking into a big giant mess and will take almost the 4 yrs to get back on track. In the meantime while we struggle to get back on track now.
Ok I guess that is enough ranting and raving by me. I would like to hear from any of you about this and how your life experience is going during these rough and bleak times.

Always remember: Never give up!

Is there life after a job layoff?

Hello People - It has now been 2.5 weeks since I lost my job, bummer. Things look a little more scarier today than the first week. I have not been able to find work within my field, mortgage industry, just like so many others in this same field. I spend a lot of time trying to figure out what else I can do. My boys asked me the first week how we would pay for things. Of course I reassured them that things would be ok. That is so "momly" isn't it. I am taking the real estate course to become a licensed real estate agent. Something I've wanted to do for a while now. This appears to be a great time to do this since there are many homes to be sold and many more to come. I would really like to try many things that I've wanted to and hope that I can. I hear my Parents voice in my head, in a negative tone, not to do something different. Maybe I only perceive it as "negative" since I am the kid. Kids seem to view things their Parents say much differently than possibly the way it really was meant to be. So I may have taken it negatively and they didn't mean it that way. I think this is where the term "generation gap" came from. Anyway, I just may be burned out in this industry I've been in for 25 yrs. It is time to do something different. I feel I would excel and be able to earn more money. The hope and thought that we might be able to do something different to earn money to live on always brings happiness to me. We have so many opportunities and many of us never take advantage of them. I don't want to be in my 60's or 70's and wonder how I would have done if I stepped out of the box I've been in for years. I am learning how to "not" listen to the voice of my Parents in my head and go with my gut. I am a smart person and yearn for more life!

So be sure to remember: Go after all your dreams, the sooner the better